I love this post – I’m always irritated by misspelling, incorrect usage, and malapropisms. These keep cropping up in published works, by reputable publishing houses, too. I assume the editors are well-paid, why are they using spellcheck instead of actually editing? “Peddling” instead of “pedaling” when we’re discussing cycling, not sales! Oh, those homonyms. They are spellcheck’s kryptonite.

The Asian calligraphy tattoos – these are pretty, but are the equivalent of the unintentionally hilarious Japanese t-shirt that has sayings in English like, “The secret to happiness is having your own nut sack,” but without the advantage of being removable. You would think a good rule of thumb would be to actually know what it is you are writing on your body. One of my sister’s boyfriends had Japanese kanji up and down one arm. He thought he knew what they meant but he wasn’t sure which character meant what. Permanent body art that he doesn’t even understand? My husband reads kanji and had to tell him what each character meant. He should have told him that it read, “Learn to read Japanese!”

One of my favourite websites: Engrish.com

Blurt

A recent news story of a misspelled tattoo got me to thinking about an old money-making idea. I went back, did some editing and brought it back.

I have a franchise business plan that will make me obscenely wealthy. Even if it only makes me fabulously well off, it will pay off in enough laughs to make it worth while.

My new business will be a proofreading service for dumb people. Why? Because dumb people insist on using words.

Every day, dumb people get tattoos, make signs and deliver messages with words that they are not qualified to use. By putting a proofreader in places where dumb people might use words, I will be ready to help protect them from themselves (and rake in the bucks).

IPY

Here is how the business, called I Proof You (IPY) will work. Let’s imagine that there is an I Proof You franchise in…

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6 responses to “

  1. You should have been an ESL teacher Lea!

  2. Wait, that isn’t the secret to happiness? Stupid shirt.